How do I stop a co-worker manipulating me?

crungmungus: How do I stop a co-worker manipulating me?
My co-worker makes a concerted effort to be dominant over me in the presence of my superiors. He tries to talk to me as though he were my boss.

What is my best defensive strategy to prevent myself from being exploited? I also don’t want him to succeed through this method.

Answers and Views:

Answer by Brenda P
That’s very tough, because when he gets overbearing you want your superiors to notice it but you don’t want them to see you react with anger or whining. If they notice his behaviour on their own (or at least think they have noticed it on their own) you will look much better than if you react verbally in front of them. So when he says or does something to establish dominance or demean you, try just looking in their direction to see if they notice. If one of them looks sympathetic toward you or annoyed by your colleague, make eye contact. Is he a particular darling of theirs? If not, they probably already realize what is going on. If anything goes wrong in your department or your division, this guy will try to lay it at your feet and make himself look great. Now is the time to be a model employee with the hours you keep, the quality of work that you do and keep meticulous records of who does what work so that you are ready to protect yourself or, more happily, you are ready to show what a great contribution you are making when you are up for review. Tread lightly, never show an emotional reaction to a person like this.

Answer by FReQuEnCy04
Just approach him and tell him that he isn’t your boss and that if he doesn’t stop bossing you around, you will speak with HR. Office life is a B!TCH!

Answer by doinou
Remind him that he is not paying your salary.

Answer by ZigiMe
I agree with Brenda. be the best you can be…not for him, but for you. I will also go on to say:
I suggest that you do not make idle threats. But, put up a wall in your mind to protect yourself from the jerk.
Understand that this person obviously has some unresolved ego issues.
start documenting everything-EVERYTHING. consult a lawyer if it gets out of control.
you might have a wonderful lawsuit in the making. consult, educate yourself and document everything.
the time will make itself right to lower the boom…