localyocal12: What do I say to my brother-in-law who does not wash his hands after going to the bathroom?
This is a grown man with his own children. He is staying in our home while he works for my husband. I have told my husband about the problem and it turns out the brother-in-law is already mad at his mother-in-law, who lives with him, for getting after him to wash his hands. So now I think my husband is afraid of offending him. I don’t want to offend him either but I need some advise on how to approach him about it. Thanks.
Answers and Views:
Answer by Kathleen
This is common sense hygiene! Ewwww! Tell him to wash his hands. It’s not his house, it’s yours. Your house, your rules. If he doesn’t like it, he can find his own place.
Try, didn’t you wash your hands? that is soo gross.Answer by Jerret
just be like dude in this house were clean, we wanna keep it that way so do your part lol, jokingly tell him to clean his hand when hes done that should get the point across in a non offending wayAnswer by Aporia
Well it is rude to try to tell him what to do and you’re correct, it would be offensive, as he is an grown adult and not a child. But you can definitely shame him, which is the polite way of going about this.
The best option is to make sure that soap and a guest towel are available immediately by the sink. When he or anyone else is on his way in, you loudly say “There’s soap and a towel by the sink if you need them.” Be sure that you say that to whoever is the first to go in the bathroom. Also put a bottle of hand sanitizer out for him.
Otherwise, you just don’t let him carve the turkey or lay the table and you certainly never chastise him or tell him to wash his hands, that is intensely rude. Have some hand sanitizer out for everyone before they eat as well.Answer by BlueCheese
If this grown man get offended by someone telling him to wash his hands, then he is a douche. Sorry but do not be afraid. Tell the man to wash his hands. Who cares if you offend him. That is not your problem. It is your house, thus they are your rules. If he is a real man, then he will show respect and understand. Or get him that antibacterial cream thing. =)Answer by Jenniflower
I would start with something passive like smiling at him and telling him your family likes to be extra clean, then hand him a bottle of antibacterial gel.Answer by Lisa K
If I were you, I would ask him if he has a problem with the hand soap you have in your bathroom. Tell him that you’ve noticed he hasn’t been using it, and that if he would prefer a different brand, to let you know. You can say you are concerned it might be too fruity or girly for him. Hopefully – this will send him the message, and you are being nice, not “getting after him”.Answer by joylen
Tell him he has to wash his hands after going to the bathroom, if he doesn’t like it, then let him find some place else to stay. Don’t worry about offending him, he is offending you.Answer by dustie rhodes
You might drop him a polite hint by mentioning how to best prevent getting the H1N1 flu virus.
A person makes contact with the virus by touching a contaminated surface,( like a door knob, phone, gas pump handle, shopping cart, etc) then later touching their face or eating. The most effective way of avoiding the illness is to be certain your hands are ALWAYS clean before you touch your face or eat.
A short slogan on one website is ” Wash it off, or eat it !! “. Hands should be washed with soap & warm water for at least 30 seconds. It would be so reassuring to know you can sit down to a meal knowing everyone has washed their hands. …..I doubt the fellow will pay any attention, sometimes people can be stupid.Answer by PinkPanther
Say, “Please wash your hands after you go to the bathroom. It’s really disgusting that you don’t. You won’t be permitted to touch anything in my house, or eat a meal with us until you DO wash after you use the bathroom. Have some common courtesy.”
Yeah, I know it sounds harsh, but shheeeeeeeeesh, a grown man who gets offended about someone asking him to wash his hands?? He needs to grow up, hear the truth and just do it. I wouldn’t sugar it over for him one bit!Answer by Ramasubramanian A
In matters of hygiene and cleanliness, i think u have to be firm. You can tell him firmly u care a damn for his health, but if he is going to stay with u, even for the limited periods of his work with ur husband,then he has to abide by the rules of the houshold. You tell him u feel ashamed to have tell such a grown up man like him about basic hygiene but u have no alternative and u do not want ur husband and your children get into health problems because of his intransigence. If necessary, you also tell him that he should get treated by a psychiatrist for such unnatural behaviour and that ur husband will arrange for that at ur own expense. If u cannot handle this, ask ur husband to do so on the above lines.Answer by Spindrift
Wow, he has some serious psychological issues if he gets upset about someone telling him to do what he should be doing in the first place, anyway, you need to tell him straight out that as long as he is in your home he needs to wash his hands every time he uses the restroom, and make sure he has plenty of hand sanitizer, that is beyond disgusting and it is a health hazard and he can and will spread his germs to everyone around him.Answer by ERIC
well did he happen to pee on his hands by any chance?Answer by Janet
How, exactly, do you know he doesn’t wash his hands?Answer by Gordon
AristotleAnswer by jenk
Tell him in a polite and jokingly way to do it. Make it a joke but insist that he does and tell him you’re gonna be after him and keep whining until he starts doing it where ever he goes.Answer by TigerLily
Just make an announcement to everyone living/working in your house and have them all in the same room (so that you do not pick one person out in the crowd), and say “Due to Health Canada’s warning to take extra sanitary precautions at this time, I have placed brand new soap dispensers, disposable towels and anti-bacterial cleanser in the common washroom. Everyone please use them. I will be checking and reminding if necessary.” end of discussion. Your house, your rules.