Do children behave better when their homes are neat and clean?

rainwriterm: Do children behave better when their homes are neat and clean?
I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, since we asked my MIL for advice about helping our 2 year old sleep. She said something to the effect of “Make sure your house is clean, make sure (your child) is clean…” So, what do you think? Do children (small children specifically) behave better, act happier, and sleep better when their homes are neat and clean? What degree of cleanliness or messiness would make the difference?

Answers and Views:

Answer by ladedamom
Clean houses have nothing to do with behavior. Parenting does. If the parents set firm boundaries that are reasonable for the child and enforce them they get well behaved kids. When they give in to every whine, tantrum and whim they get ill behaved brats. That simple. All a clean house teaches a child is to take care of their belongings and how to keep things nice and neat. A clean home and tidy children are also a reflection on the parents doing their job and showing they are well cared for rather than looking like a trashy mess. It’s not a bad thing, but I don’t think it has much to do with behavior.

Answer by Shawna(:
that kind of does make sense.

I guess toddlers might have more respect for their house and parents if their house isn’t messy, but i don’t really know.

Answer by Object Permanence
I don’t think so. Messy houses can keep parents up at night, but not kids.

Answer by Fashion Queen 561
lol….dont think it makes a diffrence!!!! Maybe that MIL thought you needed to clean up….IDK??? buT THATS WEIRD……never heard that before…..My house is spick and span and my son (6) is clean but he is still a lil bad boy sometimes…on the other hand my daughter is 12 and she is great!!! Depending on the child. Clean is just a good habit and what we should all be!!!

Answer by 1981CamaroZ28
I have 4 children myself ages 12, 11, 7 and 3 think of it this way children do what they see 99% of the time so if you keep it clean chances are they will. Now I will say this the first time you let them get there way it will be very hard to change them back.

Camaro

Answer by moogy
i’m not sure about behave better but i have noticed that in my son if we (and i do say we he helps) don’t pick up toys before bed or his nap he tends to try to get into things rather than play with the toys themselves. he’s 16 months and a climber so when a mess is left he starts scaling things lol

Answer by avi
Ooooh, this is a good question. And I agree with your MIL, to an extent. I’m not a neat freak by any stretch of the imagination but I know when the house is messy, the kids and I are stressed. There’s something relaxing about being in a clean house. Less chaos of something. I wish I could always keep the house clean but with 2 kids and a full-time career, I don’t see that happening anytime soon. Although we’ve been keeping things fairly clean lately, and peace reigns over our household.

Answer by Mrs. Z plus 3
That is a terrific question!!!

I keep an immaculate home. I also have well behaved, generally happy children. Does it make a difference? I don’t know? I also demand that my children are respectful and well mannered. Maybe it is a combination of both?

I know from a personal stand point I can NOT sleep well if my bedroom and our master bathroom is dirty. It makes me uneasy. I don’t know if it is because I am on the edge of clean house OCD or if it is a mental satisfaction…

Gosh. There is studies on everything else you can think of. Someone should do a “Clean House” study!

Really good question.

Answer by Lea
well im a teen and i dont like things to be really messy cuz it stresses me out cuz my parents will make mehh clean it but idk about little kids cuz why would they care.lol if you want him/her to sleep tell her a story and tell him/her to close him/her eyes and image it and theyll fall right to sleep.works all the time on my little sister..

Answer by Scarlette
Well, I agree with it to an extent. Clutter is stressful and potentially hazardous. If your kids get bathed and their rooms are cleaned before they go to bed, they’ll sleep better. If you set out an outfit for the next day the night before, your morning will run more smoothly. And if you have your kids pick up their toys and make their beds, they’ll learn responsibility. And with me personally, I am MUCH less stressed out and more able to be patient when my house is clean and orderly.

Answer by hbvmmix
i agree that parenting has everything to do with better behaved children. Your MIL may be referring to Qi and Feng-Shui (without realizing) That when things are in order, the energy or Qi should flow unobstructed and there is little or no displaced (misplaced) or blocked energy flow. I once had a sleepless night and I’m sure it was the energy from a big pile of unfolded clothes left in the middle of the room that night.

A good parent is in control of her children even when she is not present.

Answer by midnightmoon
In general, I would say no. However, if your child is a neat freak or easily distracted, it *could* help them sleep better to have things nice and neat, atleast in their room.

Answer by Artie Lange Fan
I don’t know, my house is clean but not super neat, it is like a children’s playland with toys everywhere and my toddler’s room has books and toys all over the place and he sleeps really well.

They seem to be happy and both sleep very well….

Edit: I have always had routines with both of them since about 3 months old so I think that helps with sleeping.

Answer by This mommy makes pretty babies
Clutter and things being out of place drive me crazy. i think yes some children would behave better. To me order and cleanliness bring calmness and peace. If that makes sense. Google Feng Shui sometime when your bored. I think the degree depends on the children.

Answer by ♥ Inked Mama Loving her Boy ♥ PM
Well… I know that I’ve found that I have a healthier attitude to things when I’m living in a tidy house and have a tidy bedroom, for as long as I can remember. But obviously I can’t remember as far back as being the age of 2, and I don’t know if it would stretch to children that young, but they are still humans, so I suppose it’s feasible. Now, for example, if I am living in mess, I don’t want to do my work, I’m lazy, I get moody easier. If I’m living in cleanliness I feel fresher, in a better mood, and more motivated to do things. Obviously 2 year olds won’t be doing any work lol. But it could be argued that the freshness of mind and brighter attitude would follow through to children that young. I seem to have an easier time with my 18 month old when the house is tidy than I do when it’s a mess, but I can’t work out if that’s simply because I enjoy myself more in a clean house and he bounces off my mood, or whether it’s down to him. As for sleeping – I think this is definitely true. My bedroom (which is shared with my son) got into a right state up until recently, clothes and books everywhere, piles everywhere. I’d been having trouble with my son at nights but hadn’t connected the two. Then a couple of weeks ago I had a massive clearout and the room ended up as nice as a hotel room, and instantly that night my son went right down to sleep with no problems, and slept through, and has been doing ever since (with the exception of the last 2 nights due to the humidity). So I’m sure there is some truth in that.

Answer by EvelynLucia
In a way, a clean house helps. They’re able to move around more, able to do things in a more safer way, and it also sets a good example for when they’re older.

If a house is messy, with things strewn all over the floor, then the child will notice that, and try an imitate it. If the house is clean, and everything is put away, then the child will also notice that, and would be more likely to clean up after themselves.

Of cause, there is a degree of cleanliness that isn’t appropriate for a child. For example, if there is nothing on the floor, than the child won’t have anything to play with, and will be bored out of their mind, Having child-safe toys and objects around the room is a much better alternative, than having non-child-safe objects on the floor.

Answer by Jack
i dont know if they would behave better, but you are suppose to be an example to your children. keeping a clean and neat house is a great example for your child. hopefully they will grow up to keep their place nice and clean and neat. I think it gives order and a higher standard of living.

Answer by lillilou
Actually experts on creativity think sometimes a mess can help foster creativity, not necessarily living in squalor, but for instance, lets say you make you 2 year old put away her doll, before getting out the next toy. Lets say this next toy is jumbo blocks. Instead if your daughter had them both out, she might creatively build a bed for the doll.

Also I do agree with many of the clutter = stress comments above though. And I often find relatives contribute to this – getting mine tons of small trinkets for valentines day, easter, etc – uuugh. Also another culprit of this can be happy meal toys – not so healthy there either.

Answer by Pet
The only effect my spotless house has on my 2 y/o daughter is apparently making her want to tear through it even faster and harder than when it’s in disarray.. I swear when I spend 3 hours cleaning the entire place she wakes up in super hyper mode and wants to open every drawer and pull out every toy and pull all the sheets and blankets off every bed, I could go on and on lol

Answer by Joe
i’ve seen bad children come from clean and dirty homes.the only difference is the ones that come from dirty homes are called bad the ones from clean homes are called rambunctious

i don’t think it really has an effect

Answer by * from the Great White North*
I have actually read some studies that suggest kids are calmer and more relaxed when they are in a better organized environment. Of course taking it to the other extreme can be harmful as well. I don’t know how much of this is true, but I do know that when my house is messy, I get stressed.And kids are like sponges, if momma stressed the kids feel it too. So I try not to let my house get to crazy for all of our sanity’s.

Answer by SARA
I read in SUPERNUNNY book that a well organised house teaches kids to respect their environment
good luck

Answer by Consider the Lilies
I think there may be a grain of truth to that theory, but only in that *sometimes* a messy home is indicative of OVERALL chaos.

I tend to pick up as I go all day long. When we’re done with an activity/toy we put things away before going on to the next activity. Now my 21 month old daughter sometimes does this on her own out of habit.

When we go to a friend’s house, they have a different philosophy – clean up one gigantic mess at the end of play time. So, while we’re there it looks pretty jumbled and chaotic. I don’t see my daughter behaving any differently whether we let it get messy or not.

As to what your MIL is talking about… I have seen families that are in total chaos (the disastrous house is the tip of the iceberg) and the kids are out of control. While a good cleaning would make everything ‘look’ ok, it wouldn’t fix the deeper problems….

Answer by Ian’s Mommy (Sam)
I think it makes sense to a degree. We try to keep a clean home, but we also encourage our 21 month old son to help clean up not only his room, but he ‘helps’ with other chores, also. We believe giving him rsponsibility and encouraging him to help keep our home clean and tidy teaches discipline and we think that a degree of discipline helps him behave better and act happier. So…I guess it does make a difference in our home at least. I’m not sure how it helps with his sleeping, except maybe since we’re on a routine during the day to an extent and then a bedtime routine (cleaning up is part of the routine-as is bathtime) he knows what to expect and it makes bed time easier.