What boundaries have you set with your teen and dating?

what’s up?: What boundaries have you set with your teen and dating?
I have a 14-1/2 year old freshman daughter who was just asked to homecoming. I am allowing her to go, as they are going in a large group and I have just met the young man for the first time. I still maintain she’s too young to date one-on-one and she cannot get into a car with someone that I have not met/do not know. What rules have you set up with your teen and dating?
I have a 19 year old son who did not start dating until he was a junior/senior in high school. He was interested in school activities, sports and working – so I was not prepared for this to happen so soon.
Please no sarcastic comments – I am looking for parents’ replies – not other teens. Thanks!

Answers and Views:

Answer by rocknrollskwurl
if it is homecoming there is no problem because the teachers inforce everything so strictly!

Answer by wolfmuslim
In my religion it is a sin to date or to be around the opposite sex unless you are married or are blood related. The parents pick out your potential husband or wife and introduce you to each other in the woman’s home and you get to see each other and know each other with the girl’s parents in the room as well. When and if they agree on marriage the woman’s father signs a marriage contract along with the future son in law and then the daughter becomes the wife of the man the parents picked out for her. Women are usually engaged for 1 year before they are married. The women in my husband’s country and in my religion don’t find out about sex until 1 month before they get married.

Answer by deshonat26
how old is the guys she is going with? i think at age 14-1/2 she should not be in a car with any one then a parent. Some kids could lie “what we think of perfect kids” say there going to home coming and really be having sex in the back of a car. or just making out but that can go to far some time in the moment.

letting her go to homecoming yeah but take her and pick her up!!!! call her when you get there early so she can come out and check in.but dont let her know

Answer by Lindsay
I’m not a parent, but I think I can give you a mature response from a teen’s point of view, because I have already graduated high school and been through this 4 years in a row 🙂

If you have already met the young man that she is going to homecoming with, and you approve, then I think that is all you can do to protect your daughter on this important night of her life. It’s her first homecoming, right? She’ll remember this for a while, if not forever, so let her enjoy herself.

Put faith in your daughter. Trust her to do the appropriate thing. Also, trust that you have taught her well enough to make the right decision if she’s put into a questionable situation.

Trusting your daughter will go quite a ways in the long run, because as she gets older, there will be even more situations that you’re going to want her to be completely honest with you about.

Answer by chic
let your daughter go. She will have a good time and you have set very good rules.

Answer by kim
oh well igoing to give u my advice if u like it oro not leave ur daughter alone she is old engough to make her desions wit boys

Answer by ILWF♥
I’m not a parent, so I apologize in advance for answering anyways, but I just felt that I could give some input.
I, too, am 14-1/2 and a freshman. I’m an only child, so its really difficult for my parents to know what boundaries should be set in place. I wasn’t allowed to go on dates other than group outings until highschool started this year, and now I can go on one-on-one dates. I’m not looking for anything serious at this age, so my parents can trust that I’m not going to do anything stupid, or in the moment.
I got asked to homecoming on Friday by the one guy that I’ve gone on a date with this year. I’m really excited, but I understand that my parents are going to have some rules. Considering the fact that we’re both 14, we can’t drive, so a parent has to be in the car. My parents don’t know his parents, but I was allowed to be driven home by them. My parents trust that I know which certain situations are safe, and which aren’t, and I do. I won’t get in a car with someone unless it feels safe- and I know that hardly seems like something to base judgement on, a feeling, but its going with your gut. My parents don’t really have any other rules except that I need to make the safest, and best choices for myself, which is definitely what I do and I wouldn’t want it any other way.
I would let your daughter have fun, but to be on the safe side, I would ask to meet his parents first. That way you can feel things out to see how they are with the dating. I think that would be the next step. But also, don’t put too much pressure on your daughter with the meeting of his parents situation since this homecoming date might not amount to anything more than just a date to a dance. Don’t treat it like they’re actually going to start dating.

Answer by jrsangel81250
i think your doing the right thing I’m not a parent but i am 19.. my parents i think just took it as it came and if they trusted me they let me go do things if not they didn’t and the trust took a very long time to build up. I’m glad your letting her go to homecoming that means alot to girls but just make sure you explain to her what you expect her to do let her know if she is some where even if she isn’t supporta be there and she calls you for help (party w/ drinking etc) and she wants to come home she won’t be punished let her make her own mistakes too…also remember her and your son aren’t the same ppl…my parents had troubles w/ that
also maybe get her a cell phone and lay down the rules w/ who she can call and let her know when mom calls she better pick up asap!
a fast sex talk and maybe birth control might help too once you think shes ready or might be thinking about doing something
good luck mom!

Answer by ElioraImmanuel
I highly suggest you and your daughter read, “I Kissed Dating Goodbye,” by Josh Harris and “Passion and Purity” by Elizabeth Elliott.

It is far better to stave off fiery passions than it is to extinguish them once they have been awakened.

Answer by Jay
I have already raised three teenagers and have two to go, and possibly some foster children . The groop thing is very good, mine always did that , but you also want to continue to pray for them. Sometimes two of them would get away from the group and had a one-on-one thing going on and I found out about it way later. They will never tell you everything that they do. But keep instilling in them to love the Lord, when they do and they have a personal relationship with Him, then they won’t want to do wrong, that is worth more than any force.