Feel insecure about my small chest and expressed this to my boyfriend…?

bookworm55: Feel insecure about my small chest and expressed this to my boyfriend…?
I’ve been told I have a striking face and really nice eyes in particular, and although I have a lean figure I’ve always been quite self-conscious about my small chest size. Yesterday when my boyfriend and I were fooling around, I told him that I was still a bit insecure about my small chest. Now, he has never made any comments to make me feel inadequate, but I know that his ex had quite a sizeable rack, and I’ve been feeling a bit self-conscious about it lately. The first time he saw my chest, he told me he thought my breasts were perfect and he said he wanted to make me feel like the prettiest girl in the world. Which is why I had expected him to be more sensitive when responding. His response was, “Aww.. well, I guess it’s one of those things you can’t do much about. Unless you want implants.” I was both shocked and upset at his answer, and I told him there was no way I was getting implants. And because I didn’t feel he had addressed me properly, I kept pressing him about it. I asked him if he really liked me, he wouldn’t worry about the size of my chest, and he agreed. When asked if he prefers big breasts or a pretty face, he said he was a face person, because breasts can’t smile and they’re pretty expressionless. According to him, all breasts have the same nerve endings, but smaller ones are supposed to be more sensitive. However, he was also candid and admitted that his ex’s rack was one of the reasons why he was attracted to her. I appreciated his honesty, but then again it’s not something I really liked to hear. When he saw that I was still feeling doubtful, he hugged me close and said, “Look, if they were any larger I wouldn’t be able to hug you this tight.” I asked him if he would change anything about me, and he said I’m fine the way I am. I know he was trying to make me feel better, but I can’t help feeling that, in retrospect, his answers were a bit detached and insensitive. I had expected him to tell me right away not to worry and that he loved everything about me, but it took a few prompts for him to even make me feel remotely better about myself. And now I’m starting to wonder if he was being genuine or just trying to appease me. I know he loves me, and perhaps guys are just awkward and don’t know how to be more attentive to these kinds of issues? Am I overthinking it, and how can I stop feeling bothered about this?

Answers and Views:

Answer by ƒσгgσ†єη
Your over thinking it.

AWW i think its so cutte and amazing the stuff he says. Clearly your breast size has nothing to do with why he likes you so much. If its not a problem for him it shouldnt be for you either. He doesnt need u to have bigger boobs nore would it make a difference at aall

Try buying a push up bra. It works wonders and will make u look bigger.
But really dont worry about it at aall! He doesnt care and neither should u.

Answer by Kelly
Okay let met get this straight. You asked for an honest answer, he gave one and now you’re mad? He doesn’t seem to be comparing his ex to you or you to her, you are.

We all have something we are self conscious about, don’t let it get the better of you.

Answer by bossman0740
You are WAY over thinking it. His response was just that, a response to your statement. He wasn’t suggesting you get implants, it’s just the only way to fix your “problem.” Guys deal in fact, not emotion. You can look for approval from him all you want but the real issue here is your self esteem regarding your breasts and no matter what he says you will never feel better until you accept yourself for who you are and be happy.

Answer by FalseAvatar
You need to relax! (and space your wall-o-text out)

He’s being honest, and it’s not always easy to say something nice AND honest. If you’re going to ask, we’re going to respond. Be glad that your man is an honest one, instead of lying to your face to make you feel better when you know otherwise.

You led him into a trap where there was no right answer. Don’t expect a miracle when you give false choices.

Answer by Troll
There are so many reasons not to get implants…cancer, operation to put them in..and eventually take them out….plus infection, etc…You are being swayed by media and a feeling of social pressure to be big breasted…and that is something that came out of the dark ages…really…women with large breasts could mother children better it was thought…but the reality of it…women with large breasts end up with back problems, and when they start to fall in mid life…yccch….so be happy you are blessed with smaller breasts…and feel sorry for those who have large breasts…they are the ones who will suffer in the long run…remember..people are like candy bars..the wrapper fades with sun and time..it is what is inside that lasts forever…so just worry about making your inside the sweetness taste of all…Cheers…

Answer by o_0luvsanimeO_O
Okay, so here’s the deal. He’s a guy. He is naturally attracted to big breasted women on a genetic level. Most are. He didn’t answer in a sensitive manner because he feels comfortable answering you honestly. It’s NOT something you can help. He probably assumed that you already knows that he loves you, and you just wanted to discuss your options. He probably had no clue that you are insecure about it in relation to him. He probably thought that you meant your general attractiveness, and now feels totally blind sighted by you getting upset over his answer.

Answer by Matt
I’m a teen guy
If you ask him then expect the truth even if it hurts a little
If you ask a guy these questions your going to get a blunt answer

Answer by Meghan
It sounds like you pressed him for these answers you didn’t want to hear. You can not be upset with honesty. He didn’t really say anything mean at all. The comment about the breast implants was just a guy being typical. Didnt mean he wanted you to get them, just one of those practical answers without thinking behind them.

He has already told you he thought your breasts were perfect, why even press the issue? You only stress youself out and cause yourself more problems.

You said he was detached and insesitive,, but you were expecting a different answer. If you do not want honesty do not ask. He may even have been annoyed by the questions, as you have asked him before. How many times do you want reassurances?? You mentioned several times you prompted him…but why exactly?? You said you were wondering if he was bein genuine or trying to appease you. Sounds to me you wanted him to appease you.

He has been very sweet about your insecurities, maybe you should believe him. If he really cared only about that, would he be with you? You continue this you may push him away.

Answer by murphfan51
I think your overreacting just a little! I think he was just offering an option, not being disresepectful, he probably wasn’t sure how you feel about implants.
I honestly think you don’t have anything to worry about, besides size isn’t everything! 🙂

Answer by Jessica
I agree with everyone, plus this tidbit: the only reason he suggested you get implants was probably for YOU since you said you’re insecure about it, you keep bringing it up, you feel he’s unhappy.
He tells you he likes them, he tells you he loves you, the problem lies within you sweetie.
Try a push up bra, and stop nagging him. He’s happy now but if you continue he won’t be for long.

Answer by k h
Ah, you made the mistake of saying that in the first place. That confuses boys – we think (and actually like to think) that you girls know that you are gorgeous and that we have won the big prize, being with you.

You should make some paragraphs when you write, it is difficult to read the whole thing. But I think any guy would feel awkward and frenetically look for something to say if his girlfriend starts saying she doesn’t like her breasts .., and probably come up with something silly.

But why should small breasts be inferior to big?! The beauty and the feelings (and even the smiles!) are as much in them. The only difference is the amount of fat. But what would more fat make better!

No, I think such things should not be discussed within a couple, because boys are not really so good at talking about it in a girl-talk way. It should be left to feeling. If he wants to convince you, he should be allowed to do so be action, caressing and so on. And then you show him, that breasts can definitely smile ;o)